No Dice (yet)

Weight: 320.6
Total Weight loss: 29.4

While I was disappointed to not get below 320 today, I decided, "Screw it!" and I'm not going to worry about it anymore. I'm just going to keep doing what I've been doing, and it'll happen somewhere down the line. I'm sick of obsessing about what amounts to a stupid number. And really, on a 300+ pound woman, how much does one pound really matter?

(Ack, a lot. But it's totally, totally mental, isn't it?)

On the bright side, one of my co-workers caught me in the break room as I was refilling my water, and was all, "Hey! I can really see a difference!" She knows I have been losing weight and struggles a bit with her own, but I got the sense that this was a genuine perception and not just a charity comment. So that was nice.

I'm trying to figure out what to do about tomorrow morning. I have my EKG and I'm getting a holter put on to monitor my heart for a 24-hour period. I scheduled it for 7:45am so that I wouldn't have to take time off from work, and I'm like... hm, can I possibly wake up even earlier than I usually do to get my run in? Well, I think I am going to. I don't want to put it off and throw off everything (not that it really would, but I am doing my best to really stick to a schedule). So, let's see... I'll need to take a bath and wash my hair... time to putz around... I guess waking up at 6am won't be too bad.

Though it could find something wrong, I am actually pretty excited to get the EKG and holter (hm, I thought it was halter, only to get the literature in advance where it says "holter", so!) and see if there really is a problem. If there is not, obviously I will be happy, but if there is, now is the time to get treatment -- though I would hope that it wouldn't interfere with my plans to someday run a marathon. ;)

So, we'll see. I am really looking forward to my run. Once I finish up Week 4, things get pretty hardcore (at least for someone like me, who isn't really athletic) and by the end of Week 5, I'll presumably be running 20 minutes in a row! Wow!

Well, I'm just here busy keeping my chin up -- even though I did direct some choice words at the scale this morning, I got over it quickly. ;) Hope your day is a good one, too.

Rainbows and Puppies,

r.